“My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style.”

- Maya Angelou

History of a Canadian coconut 

In a lot of ways, my parents are very similar. They both come from huge Catholic families, love music, prioritize lifelong learning, support their children's extracurriculars and both have done their very best to raise 3 good people.

Their love story is something of a timeless Hollywood movie. A young, blue-eyed beauty visiting Malaysia turns the head of a handsome, local Indian man. They get to know each other for a few short months before she has to return to Canada. Their courtship continued with love letters sent back and forth while waiting for immigration papers. The young couple was married within 30 days of his arrival, and 2 short years later a Canadian coconut was born (yep, that’s me!).  

My mom took care of everything for us kids, while my dad worked hard to build a career and support his family. From my perspective, it seemed like my dad never wanted to be seen as an immigrant or a foreigner, he dove into the Canadian culture head first...I joke that he’s the brownest red neck you’ll ever meet. We never learned Tamil, we never hung out with other Indian/Malaysian families, we only learned about Indian customs during our travels to Malaysia. I don’t want to completely generalize, but the women in my life pass down the traditions and stories. Not the men. I wonder sometimes how different things might be if my dad was Canadian and my mom was the Indian-Malaysian immigrant.   

I call myself a coconut because I look like a brown girl. I grew up watching Hockey Night in Canada on CBC, have a Canadian accent, and love bacon...I’m pretty stereotypically ‘white’ on the inside, with a chocolate shell. A coconut. 

"So...what are you?" 

I would be devastatingly rich if I got a dollar every time someone asked me, ‘What are you?’. I say that I look like a brown girl because I guess I don't really look Indian, just a multiracial mystery. I'm more of an ambiguous brown with a lot of my mom's Irish-Scottish features. Don't get me wrong, I’m very grateful that I have two ‘homelands’....but I also feel like I don’t really feel that sense of belonging anywhere.   

Needless to say, from a very young age I didn't fit into the mainstream, narrow categories that society tries to cram us all into. And there are so many boxes that we are asked to squeeze into. It’s not just checkboxes for ethnicity or race, it's gender, sexual orientation, religion, nationality, age, political affiliation etc.

I’ve worked really hard to build a career in a field that I’m passionate about, and like all areas of my life I just want to be seen and valued for being me. Not a categorical list of attributes, but ME as a whole. Isn’t that what we all want?   

Diversity and inclusion are not dirty words 

Diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) initiatives have gained momentum in recent years but they are not new; these fights have been going on for decades. Now more than ever we need to create a workforce that is representative of our diverse population all the way to the highest levels. A workforce that honors different viewpoints and lived experiences, and genuinely promotes inclusion and belonging.  

I have spent too many frustrating years burning out trying to prove my worth. So I started my company, Diversity Scientific to help address some gaps in the current DEI space that I’ve witnessed and experienced myself. As a scientist I am very good at researching, testing, troubleshooting and digging more into the literature as more questions and hypotheses emerge and the cycle is repeated.

There isn't enough support for new hires or people that feel underrepresented in the workplace. Sometimes being the first or only of your ‘category’ means that you need to be the 'representative' on committees/projects which creates more burden for those that already feel like they have a brighter spotlight monitoring their performance and sets expectations that one voice speaks for all others in that 'category'.  

Diversity and inclusion are not dirty words. On the contrary, there is growing recognition of the positive impacts diversity and inclusion practices have on productivity and profitability and employee retention (1, 2, 3).  

What can we do?

Creating the perception of a visually diverse workforce is not enough, we all need to be authentic and true to our own stories and empathetically listen to others. These are major shifts in an antiquated, rigid system, so it will take time to reach a point where we can prioritize and appreciate the skills, voices and lived experiences of a diverse team...but I believe it's possible.   

I have developed a course called Empowered Diversity @ Work that recently transitioned to an online format. It focuses on teaching professionals who feel underrepresented in their jobs how to show up confidently and navigate their path to success. This course raises your emotional intelligence, teaches essential skills to deal with demanding jobs and gives practical, proven techniques to create space and ease in your life.   

Sign up to access our free quiz to learn if you are on the road to burnout and some practical strategies to deal with workplace stressors. You will also get access to exclusive offers once the course is released! Check it out HERE.